Vignette: Weighed My Balls on a Kitchen Scale

This girl kicked me out of her house.... just cause she caught me weighing my balls on her  kitchen scale…

(423 grams btw.)

I whipped my balls out, started weighing them, she walks into the kitchen, and does this:

I freeze... and do this right back at her:

Then she proceeds to scream and yell at me, tells me to get out of her house...

What da fuck did I do? The reason I weighed them at her house was 'cause I don't have a scale at my place and it was just lying there... I swear it called my name...

This same girl just caught me blow drying my penis after a shower and asked me what I was doing.  Apparently "heating your dinner" was not the right answer.

Vignette: 715 lbs x 12 deadlifts

So I  decided to push my dead lifting off till Saturday so I could be rested and prepared...

I was in the zone... beast mode.. I did 12 Singles with 715 Pounds Deadlift (no belt - 60 second rest periods).  I surprised even myself.

The whole gym stopped and stared  lol

Of course the fact that I was making noises like a silverback gorilla getting fucked and turning purple may have had something to do with the stares... but I would rather think they were admiring

Earlier in the week this fat chick from the gym had invited me over that night for spaghetti Saturday night... I went even tho I could barely move from dead lifting my balls off  

went like this.....:

her: do you want a blowjob?
Mule: no thanks i'm not really in the mood maybe later
her: you sure? because i dont really have anything to do.
Mule: nah i'm good
her: i mean if it's because i use too much teeth i can call up my friend to give you one. i heard she gives great bjs.
Mule: no really i don't want a bj right now
her: well if you want one i'll just be in the kitchen

btw for background .. I  had spotted her Wednesday  on the hamster-wheel while she was working the cellulite off her gigantic ass whilst I was squatting 6 plates a side and teabagging the ground during the week....

yes i know i know, what am i doing with such a whale.. but she makes a killer of a sammich...shes a complete beluga whale but she's a great cook (Italian) and got some big DD's so I broke her over and wrecked it like it was going out of style in the sauna (you just got to put an "out of order" sign on the door) on Wednesday and she invited me over to her place out of graditute for me fukcing her even tho she's way below my usual standards ...

 I would have  liked to reverse cowboy and tittie fuk them great big titties while she tongued  my bung hole... but I was  too tired last night tho