Vignette: Verizon

I got a Droid Incredible at the local Verizon store. I've enjoyed using it so far, but I've dropped it a bunch of times and it's starting to slow down. So I realized today I was eligible for an upgrade on my phone so I decided to head back to the Verizon store and get a new one. I show up at about 1 p.m. today and it's pretty busy...there's about 20 people in the entire store including both employees and customers.  As luck would have it I don't get the 7.5/10 chick  and end up talking to the ~50 year old woman named Meredith who's quite overweight but looks nice. I talk to her a bit about upgrading, and eventually I decided to go with the iPhone 5.

She invites me to sit down at her desk to fill out a new contract and go through all the paperwork. She asks if I want everything transferred from my Droid Incredible to my new iPhone 5, and I say sure, because it's a pain in the butt to get everyone's contact information again and transfer it over.

So to backtrack a little bit, I need to describe the layout of the Verizon store a little bit. It's setup so that the employees desks are in the corners, with seating for the customers closer to the wall and the employees' chairs closer to the interior of the store. This means that the employees' computer screens are facing inwards to the interior or the store as well.

So we're going through the process of filling out the paperwork, and I start to feel like people in the store are starting to look at me. Now,  This isn't really an unusual feeling for me as I am used to people looking at me and I don't really mind it . I then start to feel like some people that are looking towards me are even snickering and that's seemed odd..

Meredith is continuing to talk to me, but at this point I'm not really sure what she was saying as I was getting distracted by the other people in the store. And then I realize what is happening.

I look at Meredith and see the reflection of her computer screen off her glasses.....every single picture I had taken on my Droid Incredible over the past 2.5 years was flashing across the screen as it was being transferring to my iPhone. Every. Single. fucking. One.

This includes the 100+ selfies of me flexing in the mirror, taking pictures of my glutes, my calves, awkwardly trying to take back pics. Probably 30-40 of them were quad pics with visible bulge. Nudes and nudies.   It includes even creepier photos I've taken of cute girls I've seen at the mall, supermarket, and the movies. Pics from the gym of hot underage teenage girls wearing spandex volleyball shorts and sports bras.  Every single one of them...exposed for the Verizon Wireless population to see.

I can see them rapidly flashing through on Meredith's glasses. Eventually, she glances at her screen and sort of recoils and stops mid-sentence. She quickly hits the power button on her monitor and turns off the screen as the transfer finishes. She continues to go through the contract obligations for my new plan, but her tone is different and she's talking faster and she is looking off towards the side.

 Meredith finished up my contract, I signed, and got the fuck out of that store as fast as possible. I got to my jeep and realized I had forgotten to grab my new phone. I walk back in and everyone just sort of stops and looks away. I go up to Meredith, grab the phone off her desk, and exit again.