Vignette: Raged out in bank

Here is an old gem from way back in March of 2009:

Raged out in bank

Went in to get money cash, ‘cuz I couldn’t find the debit card. My ID has been expired for over a year, fuck waiting a whole day in the DMV! The fat fuck cashier, ‘bout mid-40s, bout 5’3” an’  ‘bout 3fiddy pounds SERIOUSLY says: “Your ID is expired I can’t give you any money.”

I say, “You have been giving me money for the last few months and never had a problem with my expired ID and you are telling me that you can’t give me my money, my money from my bank account! You didn’t say that last week, what’s wrong having a bad day today or something?”

She says: “I am sorry but your bad attitude won’t help you. “

I said: “Listen Fat Ass, it’s my money and my fucking bank account, so get your fat ass off that chair and get me my money.”

She said: “I am not going to tolerate this attitude, I will call the guard!”

SERIOUSLY?  So I said: “You fat fucking fuck, you fat fucking bitch and your fucking bad day, you fat fuck, get your fat ass out of there and get a better attitude, fat bitch!”

I can't believe how that obnoxious customer talked to me today,
 and yet  for some reason I can't stop masturbating over him.

Mind you, this is Friday in a bank with dozens of people in line, and I looked at the chick, and said “You fat fuck”, etc.  But it gets better: So the fat fucking bitch calls the guard  and this fucking fat fuck guard waddles over...I’m a thinking: “How many cheeseburgers you gotta drive into that gut to look like that?”

So the fat fuck guard says: “Big Fella, you making a huge scene, you needs to get off the steroids, and you’re banned from coming to this bank, if you comes here again we will call the cops!”

Now mind you there's more muscle in my left nut than there is in this fat fuck guard's entire body...I’m a seriously thinking I should just drop him...give him the ‘ rock bottom’ and the ol’ ‘people’s elbow’ FTW!

Did someone call for security?  Has anyone seen my feet?

...yeah SURE he's got a gun... but I’m a pondering if my jacked muscle fibers can stop a bullet...use my jacked up muscle fibers like organic body armor or some shit …’ cuz I’m a planning on ripping his balls off and slap him to death with them...this fat fuck guard can't do shit if he's a pile of entrails on the floor...!

But then I look at the gun again, and I’m a like:  “...fuck it... I don't give a snail’s kunt..." and I high tail it out of there before they call the cops and that’s why—to make a long story short—I’m against any moar bank bailouts!