Musings from Valhalla: Awkward Words After Sex

When you are MULE, 

sex can get suddenly complicated!

 AWKWARD WORDS AFTER AND DURING SEX

 her: I think your dick's too big for my vagina 
 me: Nah it'll work
*puts penis in, begins thrusting* 
her: stop, stop, ow 
her: I'll just suck your dick instead 
me: fine 
*she starts sucking my dick* 
*I fall asleep* 
*after she swallows the last I have to give-she begins to feel awkward and leaves in walk of shame*

♥♥♥♥

*After pulling out and busting a nut in the dark*
 Her: "OMG IT'S EVERYWHERE!!!" 
Me: "Did I get your face?" 
Her: "No..." 
Me: "Damn, gotta aim higher next time"

♥♥♥♥

Her:Wow, that was great! 
Me: Ok, you can leave now...

Things I have said:

-But your mother likes anal...

-Yeah baby, you smell used.

-What's your mom’s name again?

- Do score cards bother you?

- Your dog licked my balls...

- Your sister likes this too.
-You're gonna regret this tomorrow
-You have change for Bus?
-Try different hole this time?
-Who are you, again?
-Probably should of pulled out 
when the condom broke
-Get the Phuck off me and don't snail-trail 
on me or my side
-So, do I give you money or something?
-What were those little red sores on your vagina?
-Smile for the Camera
-Don't worry the effects of the chloroform 
will wear off soon
-Wait, Is that a Penis?
- funny, when you have that bra on, you have tits. 
where did they go?
-If I untie you, do you promise not to run?
-So, do you come here often?"
-STFU BISH I'm trying to sleep
-Sammich ?

Things said to me:

-May my dog join us?

- Fill out this health form.

- Pretend to be my dad.

- Grandma died on this bed.

- Just like Grandpa does it!

- We shouldn't have eaten beans!
-My dad might come home soon 
you gotta go now!
- That wasn't too bad.
-I haven't been fucked like that 
since grade school