Musings from Valhalla: Beer v. Pussy

OKTOBERFEST
September 19th -October 10th 2015

FROM THE GANG AT MULESBLOG!!!

This Musing is originally from my old blog, from August 2008

thought it would be great for Oktoberfest 2015

BEER V. PUSSY

Hey hey hey... It is time to do a comparison between two things treasured by men: beer and pussy

*A beer is always wet. A pussy needs encouragement.

*Peeling labels off of beers is fun...peeling panties off of pussy is more fun.

*If you suddenly drop a beer, it may break. If you suddenly drop a pussy, it may hunt you down like the dog you are

*It is socially acceptable to have a beer in the stands at a football game, but You are a legend if you have a pussy in the stands at a football game

*If a cop smells beer on your breath, you are going to get a breathalyzer. If a cop smells pussy on your breath, you are going to get a high five

*Having an ice cold beer makes you satisfied. Having an ice cold pussy makes you Hillary Clinton

*The government taxes beer. 

*24 beers come in a box. A pussy is a box you can come in. 

*If a beer is brewed with yeast, it is still edible.

*If you come home smelling like beer, your woman may get mad. If you come home smelling like pussy, she will definitely get mad.

*6 beers in a night and you better not drive. 6 pussies in a night and you have done all the driving you need. 

*Wearing a condom does not make a beer any less enjoyable. 

*If you think all day about the next pussy you will have, you are normal. If you think all day about your next beer, you are an alcoholic. 

*If you try to snag a beer at work, you get fired. If you try to snag a pussy at work, you get hit with sexual harassment. 

*If you change to another beer, your old brand will gladly have you back. 

*The best pussy you have ever had is not gone once you have enjoyed it. 

*With beer, bigger is better-----

BEER + PUSSY= PARADISE